The bus ride seemed to last about the same amount of time as the first. There were only a few people who joined me this time. A couple sitting in the back and a man about my age sitting across the aisle from me.
“How long have you been here?” I asked to the man across from me.
“Not that long, sir, I’m really not feeling comfortable anywhere I go.”
“Yeah, tell me about it,” I chuckled. “You obviously have been to Gula, where else have you been?”
“Only Luxuria-Fornicatio and Gula,” he said, “It has been really weird. Each place is full of things I feel uncomfortable doing.”
“Well you sound just like me, man. I’ve been to the same places, and every person here seems comfortable with things I’m obviously not comfortable with. Did you get yourself a name?”
“No, I was kind of afraid to jump right into the culture. You?”
“I didn’t get a name either. Well I’ll just call you Bro then,” I laughed.
“Sounds good, man; that’s what I’ll call you.”
“Ok, you want to travel around for a while with me?” I asked; finally glad to have a companion with similar thoughts.
“Yeah definitely,” he said very excitingly. We both shook hands, and before we knew it, the bus was at Acedia. When we got out of the bus, I noticed a fog that kind of hovered over the city. Just by appeal, this city looked the worst of the three. We still decided to venture into the front gate. If we were going to end up stuck on the island, we would have to find some place suitable for us.
Yet again, the first thing I noticed walking inside the gate was the name and job table. My new friend ventured over there, and I was kind of wondering what he would be doing. I went over next to him, to find that he decided to give himself a name. Bro was what he wrote down on the paper; no last name or anything. It made me smile and laugh to know I had some sort of an impact on someone here. I knew that we would make a good team. I didn’t get my name changed to Man because I was still clinging to finding my real name; luckily Bro didn’t mind. After spending some time at the job table, we started walking down the main road. Not many people were outside. There was a couple corner speakers like the other cities, but the ones at this city made me laugh. They weren’t very enthusiastic. One wasn’t even speaking. He was just sitting on his box with his hands covering his lowered head. No one was around either of them. At that moment, I was thinking either people were getting tired of hearing these people or there was some kind of gathering going on that made the streets look desolate.
While we were still walking, we heard a guitar and a man singing inside a building. When we made it inside there was a large amount of people. The place looked like a bar or pub. The guy singing was on a stage, but he looked more drunk than anyone in the room. He was still playing guitar very well but his singing was just mumbling. It didn’t seem very appealing to me, and Bro gave me a look of no assurance. Because that was the only place we had seen with people, we sat down and ordered some food. The man taking or order seemed relaxed and welcoming.
“What would you guys like to order?” he said very politely.
“Cheeseburger and water please.” I said. Then Bro ended up ordering the exact same thing.
“Is that it?” the waiter asked. “You don’t want the special or anything? That is what most people come to this place for.”
“What is the special?” I asked not seeing it on the menu.
“Your choice of two shots or a couple hits of weed.”
“Oh no, we don’t want that. Is weed even legal here?”
“Oh wow,” the waiter chuckled, “Anything goes around these parts. You remember the two rules? That is the only thing that will be ever considered for a rule here.”
“Ok well we still wouldn’t like it,” I said as I looked at Bro for some confirmation. He looked and me and nodded in affirmation.
“Alright then, we will have your food ready soon.” The waiter said still laughing at us. I guess I didn’t really pay much attention to the people around but everyone seemed to be drinking or smoking. I guess the waiter was right when he said that is why most people go here. I had already assumed it wasn’t for the mumbling musician in the corner who was almost passed out by now but still playing guitar. It was kind of sad to see so many people all looking sad or down though. Bro and I decided that we would try to find some people to talk with about Acedia after we ate.
Before we knew it, our food was there. It was definitely not as good as Gula’s steak; that was for sure. It was still great though. We got the bill and I insisted to pay because I had received so much from my weekend job in Gula. It was only ten Coin anyway. That was only one hour of my weekend. After I paid the check and tipped the waiter, we left to find someone to talk to. We both decided that someone drunk or high would not be the best choice.
Continuing down the road, I saw some men around a fire in one of the alleys. They didn’t look like they were under any influence so Bro and I decided to walk down the alley and visit them.
“What are you boys doing here?” One of the men said in a grumpy voice.
“Well, we thought we would visit with all of you for a while. We are kind of new to this city.” Bro responded.
“Alright, whatever,” the man said, “There isn’t much to hear. Take a seat.” The man then pointed to a few pieces of cardboard. “What do you guys want to hear?”
“Since we are new here, we just wanted to know about this city.” I said.
“Ah, well this city isn’t much in itself,” The man started, “Me and some these guys have been here for over 30 years. There isn’t anything on this dumb island that will satisfy you.”
“I remember for my first five years I visited each city and dove right into its culture.” Another man added, “Every time I did all that I could do in that city I just wanted more. If I could give you any advice, it would be to not waste your time.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, “By not looking at the other cities?”
“No,” the first man replied, “Look all you want, but once your involved you will lose sight of everything else. Once you lose that thing, you will feel like you’ve lost it all.”
“Is that what happened to you, sir?”
“It happened to all of us. We found ourselves here because this place is best described as apathetic. We lie around and don’t care about anything anymore. May sound dull to you but it’s a whole lot better than seeking for something you will never find.”
“What is that you are seeking for?” I asked.
“Joy,” the man paused as if he thought of something that he had forgotten. “I feel like I had it in my past. Before I came here, I’m sure I did.” The man next to him comforted him.
“Here is my last beer man,” he said as he gave it to the other. The man took it and sunk off into a nonsocial state. From what I understood, the people who have been on the island the longest end up here. The men seemed very wise, but they still seemed to find themselves trapped.
“Well thank you sirs,” I said. Then Bro and I headed back to the main street.
“That was encouraging,” Bro said sarcastically.
“Yeah tell me about it. That really gives me a…” I was interrupted by a loud bang from a balcony above us. “…Bad feeling.” Only a second later a young man fell from the balcony and landed right next to us. His face was disfigured from the fall, but it looked like he was shot through the mouth. It wasn’t a moment later that a handgun fell down as well. When it landed it shot off and scared Bro and I. By this time a couple large men turned the corner. They looked like police.
“Let’s see what happened here.” One of them said nonchalantly.
“Probably another suicide.” The other responded.
“Yep,” the first commented, “He has a one of them sad notes here. Well let’s get him out of here.” Then the two large men resumed picking the dead man up and taking him around the corner. I assumed that they must have an emergency vehicle around there.
“Wow, that is really sad.” I said to Bro.
“Yeah, I don’t understand why.” Bro said. Then we looked over and noticed that the officers had left the note on the ground. Bro picked it up and started reading it. “I feel so alone. No one cares about what I do in life. I pretty much gave up all that I am to the people around me trying to find purpose in it. No one gave anything back. They didn’t even notice me. If I am just going to be alone on this Island, why can’t I just know my purpose it here? It is so empty in meaning. I’ve been everywhere I can. I’ve talked to everyone, striving to be noticed or accepted by something or someone. But nothing is satisfying. I’m leaving now. Whatever is beyond this is better than lying in my waste. If anyone is reading this, my only advice is to quit caring. Use people because they only use you, and quit hoping for whatever is beyond this . . . it’s useless.”
“Oh man,” I couldn’t even say anything else. I was so overwhelmed with sadness that I just stared at the paper in Bro’s hands.
“I think we should leave this city.” Bro said disgusted. “There has to be something better. I’m still hoping.”
“Me too,” I said, “Let’s see what else is out there.” We then began to walk towards the opposite side of the city that we came in from. As we walked down the road we started to see a large crowd near the bus station. Bro and I both looked at each other in agreement to approaching the crowd, especially because we were so close to leaving. When we got close enough a young lady at least five years younger than me approached us. She then insisted on giving us a couple bags as she started to speak.
“I’m sorry it is so difficult here sirs. Please take these as a gift from LOAVES. It stands for Loving Others and Vanquishing Environmental Sadness.”
“That sounds intense,” said Bro, “Why is your group doing this?”
“Can you not tell the overwhelming sadness here?” she replied. “We just want to minimize that. Inside your bags are two separate meals and 20 Coin. We feel like it is bringing a small amount of hope to these desperate people.” As she was talking she was gesturing we look in our bags, and so we did. She continued, “How are you guys feeling? What has been the most wearing on you?”
“I’ve only been here a few days, but I feel like nothing is satisfying,” I mentioned, “It seems like most people are able to quickly find their place. Either here or the other two cities we have gone to. We haven’t found a place for us, but I am at least glad that I am not in sadness like I have seen here.” Then I had an inclination to ask her the same question, or maybe something similar. “Have you found anything to be satisfying either?”
“I’ve been here all my life,” she explained, “It seems that everywhere is almost just as you explained it. A guy I greatly respect started LOAVES up to try to bring joy and satisfaction to others through meeting needs. I think that is where I am most satisfied. Helping others brings me joy. I am able to see people make it one more day, or see people continue to have hope in a better future. These deep conversations and the smiles on others faces has brought me enough joy. I know this is what I am supposed to do.”
“I’m glad you have found something,” I said, “With no disrespect to your organization, which I think is a great idea, I feel like there is something more out there. My heart keeps telling me there is a deeper satisfaction out there.”
“So in search for it, we are headed to Ira,” Bro said, “thank you for your kind gifts!” then we walked past the group and got on the bus toward Ira-Invidia.I'll be posting Chapter 8 around April 17th
